2007-04-07

Poem: Speak for Yourself (Blog Against Theocracy #1)

Speak For Yourself

how many voices have you silenced?
whose truth do you fear?

what sends you running for shelter
in your god's shadow,
clinging to the hem of his rotten shrouds,
praying to him for the bad words to stop?

your ignorance is vile
dangerous
violent

you would see me struck down
silence my voice, my truth
to preserve your fragile ballast of lies

preaching vainly of greater good
you bring greater harm

there isn't room enough in hell for both of us

you go first

(April 1992)



I had wanted to start posting for Blog Against Theocracy yesterday, Friday, but I was too tired. I have lots of material, too much and too varied to organize into a linear presentation. This will be the first of an indefinite number of, let's say several, posts this weekend. My instinct is that a larger number of shorter posts will serve this topic, and me, better.

I just woke up, restless, unable to sleep. The inner monologues was ranting loudly, the rage and anger in my head railing against an unnamed "you": You hate who I am, You hate what I am, You hate me, You want me dead.

Then I remembered I'd written this poem. The subject of the poem was ... well, maybe I'll get to that another time. Suffice that it was someone whom I did not choose to have in my life at the time, and is no longer.

Thank god.



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2 comments:

Tengrain said...

Xris -

For what it is worth -- you are not alone waking up to that sort of thinking.

I figured out a while ago that sometimes it is just as important to be hated (by the intollerant) as it is to be loved by the good. It shows that you are doing something right.

I'm looking forward to more (and I still think we need to talk gardening something!)

Regards,

Tengrain

Xris said...

Thanks, TG! This is just #1. There's more coming.